Whining and reflection

I have been so weepy, serious, and reflective the past few days. I think it because my husband is in another country and we all miss him so much. The first week was OK but this week has been really hard. We just miss him. We have been jumping on each other for the smallest things and the kids have been fighting constantly. I think its just an imbalance not having him here. But he will return tomorrow and things hopefully will go back to "normal" whatever that is. But that also depends on how he is doing- I think he had a REALLY rough time but I knew it would be really hard for him. I just don't think he realized how hard.

I forced myself to get the kids going and go to church this morning. I couldn't bear sitting around here another day with nothing to do but the twenty million chores that will never get done while the weather is nice. It was OK- they fought because Summer refuses to go to the kids class and sits with me and Adam's class ends right in the middle of service (I know its weird) so he has to come and sit with us for the last half hour. Well they got to bickering and I was VERY irritated. Let's just say my patience is running VERY low. God bless the single parents. I feel like I have been correcting and breaking up fights the whole weekend. Oh well, time to move on. I also forced myself to go to a dinner at the church with the kiddos this evening for the Vacation Bible School kickoff. I really REALLY did not want to go for many reasons- one my brain and energy level is dead, two I really did not feel like socializing, three I hate walking into a room (especially a dinner) not knowing barely anyone and sitting down and eating with strangers, four my kids really did not want to go. BUT we went. It was OK and the people that I will be working with were very nice. But let me tell you what happened when we left. So it was 8:00 and we were pooped getting ready to walk out when we heard this beautiful unbelievable voice singing opera. I was drawn to it. We went into the sanctuary and a lady was practicing her opera singing. We sat down and listened. The three of us were the only ones there listening. It was so beautiful I started to cry- I mean not like blubbering crying but tears in my eyes crying. Once again I embarrassed my daughter with my uncontrollable emotion. SOMETHING moved me. I don't know if it was the emotion she sang with or it was just that moment but I truly appreciated that moment. We didn't stay long- only a few minutes because Adam was beyond tired but it was beautiful. Marwa always reminds me- to stay in the moment because it will pass! I know one day I will look and my little boy will be a young man and the last thing he will want is for me to read his favorite fairy tale. I know because I now have a young lady on my hands- a beautiful, smart, reflective, empathetic young lady. OK the tears are coming back again-I am just a weepy mess! time for me to go get something done.